Norsemen FC vs Weirside Rangers FC
Edmonton Sports Ground
Oct 23rd 2010
Dominating Norsemen Take Rangers Up The Weir
Dear Diary,
My favorite day of the week has come around once again. I get to have a lie in and not go to work. I also get to play football with my friends and Ballers. So I wake up and have some breakfast and then head home. When I get home I am met by Thomas who is pumped about the game vs Weirside. And rightly so as it is a clash of the early leaders. I was talked out of getting in Thomas’ lovely sports car by Dobbo, who made me get London’s loved and trusted public transport. The 149 bus to be more specific. Two things that angered me about this. 1.Boris has been a little sod and changed the 149 service from a bendy bus to a double decker. This has put an end to free travel to and from lovely Edmonton. 2. It took 30 f ing minutes for the 149 to show its ugly new face. This made me late by half an hour. Thanks very much Boris. Well done you. I hate you. Not because you are a babbling idiot but because what you have done to the 149 bus. Unfuckingbelievable.
So I turn up for football half an hour later with Dobbo. Dobbo shoots off to make his Norsemen debut for the 7’s and I go and get changed. I meet Leeroy in the changing room. I don’t think he was expecting me to walk in as he was blearing out some Disney songs on his IPod. Funny lad our Leeroy.
Finally managed to get out with the other chaps and what do you know, Jacko goes and falls over on his finger. He only bloody injures himself doesn’t he. What a klutz! Thomas then runs off in search of a new keeper. Ricky wont give us JJ. I have always said he is spiteful. Thomas then goes to ask the vets for the use of Shay. The first thing Casey asks is “why don’t you take JJ?” Thomas thinking on his feet replies “The 2’s game has already kicked off.” A complete lie as Joe Morris is running back to the grocers pitch with the corner flags in his hand. The lie seems to work though and before you know it Ballers is attempting to warm Shay up. I say try because Ballers struggles with football and he normally kicks the ball wide. Shay has a good warm up fetching the ball though.
We line up as follows:
GK – Shay
LB – Muzza
RB – Ossie
CB – Macca
CB – Tajae
LM – Hempsey
RM – Gav Morais
CM – TT
CM – Tadd
CF – Leeroy
CF – Jarrett
Subs:
Arda
Ballers
Thomas
We have possibly the strongest line up possible now Ballers is on the bench…… He is good for team morale though.
It is 15.00 and it can mean only one thing. The referee lines up everyone on the centre spot and makes us shake each other’s hands. Think the referee thought he was refereeing the premiership or something. Anyway we all exchange our handshakes and well wishes and then line up for kick off.
Norsemen started where they finished off the week before at HSBC. There was some nice one touch passing and great intensity throughout the team. This could have something to do with Ballers being a spectator but I can’t confirm this. Leeroy went close very early on but unfortunately managed to lob the keeper and the goal.
About 15 minutes in and Norsemen go one up. After a neat move down the right hand side, Coleman is pushed over. Very uncharacteristically Coleman gets up and starts moaning at the ref. Thomas in turn moans at Coleman for giving up. Coleman doesn’t like this and thinks to himself “I will show Thomas giving up.” Coleman heroically picks himself up and chases a pass back to the Weirside centre back. Coleman just lashes at the ball and luckily puts a sliced cross into the Weirside area. Jarrett found himself in acres of space and calmly nods the ball into the corner of the goal. Norsemen 1 – 0 Weirside.
Norsemen gain confidence from the goal and start to dominate the game. A nice move down the left this time sees Hempsey whip in a ball that is half cleared to the edge of the area. Gav Morais takes a lovely first touch to take the ball away from the onrushing defender. Most people in this situation would just lash the ball aimlessly at the goal in this situation. Not Gavin. What Gavin did was calmly place a very slow volley into the corner of the net from the 18 yard line. Some would say it was a scuff but I have played with Gavin enough times to know there was no scuffing going on. Norsemen 2 – 0 Weirside.
Norsemen carry on with a very intense tempo and allow Weirsdie no time on the ball. Shay still hasn’t touched the ball at this point. Norsemen come close a couple more times before Leeroy pounces on a poor ball across the Weirside defence. Leeroy punishes the Weirside defence with a neat finish into the corner of the net. Norsemen 3 – 0 Weirside.
With 5 minutes left in the first half Norsemen scored a fourth. However the ref didn’t see it. Leeroy again pounced on some sloppy defending and played the ball across the goal to Jarrett. A will try and paint a mental picture of the scenario. Jarrett was standing about 4 yards from the goal line. The goalkeeper was laying on the ground about 6 yards to the left of the goal. A Weirside defender was standing on the near post. Jarrett blasted the ball into the back of the net. He blasted it so hard that the ball went through the net. There was no hole in the net though so Jarrett must have hit the ball so hard, the ball broke down into a molecular form, allowing it to pass through the net. Well either that happened or Jarrett actually missed an open goal from 4 yards. I am sticking with my original story though. Surely a player of Jarrett’s quality can’t miss such a chance.
Half time and Norsemen lead by 3 goals. Thomas gets us to sit down in the changing room and doesn’t have much to say. The reason for this being that we played a very good half. Simple as.
The second half begins and Norsemen are still buzzing. The Weirside team must have been on the end of a telling off as they seem to have upped their game by somewhat. Norsemen start with a couple of chances. One falling to Coleman who tried to bend the ball into the far corner with the outside of his boot. However he scuffed it and the ball nearly ended up in the bowls green.
Weirside then put together their first meaningful move of the game and with a ball being whipped in from the right hand side the Weirside central midfielder threw himself at the ball and scored a neat diving header. Best goal of the game. Probably Coleman’s fault for not tracking his man. However I believe his honesty will get him off the hook for the goal.
As the game went on it became a bit more stretched with Weirside looking to get back in the game. Norsemen tried to play on the counter. Leeroy made way for Arda and Muzza for Ballers. Arda managed to miss from 3 yards and Ballers managed to find touch with most of his touches. Safety first. Thomas came on with 5 minutes to go for Gav Morais and saw the game out to safety. The second half was a more balanced game. The game finished Norsemen 3 – 1 Weirside. Norsemen deserved the victory from their heroic first half display.
We all went in and did the usual array of willy dances in the showers and then got drunk in the bar after. All in all a lovely day.
Went home and stayed out of trouble.
Good night world.
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